1. Never squat with your spurs on.
2. Don't interfere with something that isn't bothering you.
3. Timing has a lot to do with the outcome of a rain dance.
4. The easiest way to eat crow is while it is still warm. The colder it gets, the harder it is to swallow.
5. If you find yourself standing in a hole, stop digging.
6. If something doesn't seem worth the effort - it probably isn't.
7. It doesn't take a genius to spot a goat in a flock of sheep.
8. The biggest trouble-maker you will ever to deal with watches you shave your face in the mirror every morning.
9. Never ask a barber if you need a haircut.
10. When you start to think you are important - try ordering someone else's dog around.
11. Never worry about biting off more than you can chew, your mouth is bigger than you think.
12. Always drink upstream of the herd.
13. Telling someone to get lost and making them do it are two entirely different propositions.
14. When you ride ahead of the herd, look back every now and then to make sure it is still with you.
15. Good judgment comes from the experiences gained when exercising bad judgment.
16. When you give lessons in meanness to people or animals, don't be surprised if they learn them.
17. When you start to throw your weight around, be prepared to have it thrown by someone else.
18. Letting the cat out of the bag is a whole lot easier than putting it back in.
19. The fastest way to double your money is to fold it up and put it back in your pocket.
20. Never miss an opportunity to shut up.

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